In the summer of 2016, I found myself in a really hot and humid room, sitting on my yoga mat, exhausted, sweaty, and quite frankly upset. I had been practicing yoga for two years at the time, but this was my first attempt at an arm balance called crow pose. For those unfamiliar with yoga, in crow pose, you plant both your palms down, launch your knees behind your arms, and lift your feet so only your hands make contact with the ground. It’s not exactly the most comfortable position to be in, to say the very least.
So there I was with my two hands on the ground, my knees behind my arms as I lifted one foot, then the other. My face was red and my arms were shaking as I dropped to the ground with a thud I knew everyone had heard. I tried several more times to get both feet up, every time with similar results. I drove home obsessing about what I did wrong and where I could have improved. Then, right there in the car, a thought struck me. I had been able to get one foot off the ground and still balance my entire body! In that moment, I realized yoga wasn’t only about perfecting the pose; celebrating the small but important moments in my progress was just as important.
Small Moments Matter
We live in a culture that demands massive changes and instant transformations. We are led to believe our goals are only meaningful if they yield immediate, concrete results. Clients in recovery are no exception. Clients often tell me about their goals, which can include things like staying sober, regaining custody of children, finding work, and securing housing. These are awesome goals to have, but these large goals require constant motivation and daily action. The motivation to achieve large goals can flag during recovery, and individuals may feel hopeless and downtrodden.
The awareness of these small but important wins helps clients find the motivation to do the hard work required to make lasting positive changes in their lives.
We must find a way to combat this feeling. Positive psychologists such as Charles Snyder have stated that highlighting past successes and the small victories during recovery can boost confidence, improve motivation, and strengthen their belief that their goals are achievable. As a doctoral intern for Sanctuary Centers’ Co-Occurring Disorders (COD) program, I help clients recognize that it is okay to pause at any time and recognize how far they’ve come in their work towards meaningful goals and positive healthy changes. In my several years of working with a wide variety of clients, I have found that many in recovery get stuck on emphasizing what’s going wrong, which keeps them from seeing all the progress they have made in therapy. By only focusing on the negative, clients in recovery often miss the small but meaningful changes they have made in their daily habits – changes that benefit both mind and body. The awareness of these small but important wins helps clients find the motivation to do the hard work required to make lasting positive changes in their lives.
Four Ways to Celebrate the Small Wins
Through my previous experiences and training I have learned several ways in which individuals can start the process of celebrating the small wins. These are my personal top four.
1. Notice Your Progress
What are some things you have done today that align with your goals for recovery? Noting how far you have come from can help you understand all the ways that you are making progress. Noticing these small wins helps you appreciate them and yourself for achieving them.
2. Write it Down
Writing down your accomplishments helps you see your progress. If you like, you can keep a daily journal. If journaling is not for you, simply write a list of accomplishments you are proud of. These accomplishments can be as simple as making healthy food choices in the day or connecting with supportive family and friends. Every win – no matter how small it may seem – is a very big deal on the road to recovery.
3. Share Your Success with Your Support System
Everyone needs a support system. Whether it’s your friends, your family, or a sober living community, your support system can be there to cheer you on in your victories and help you out when times get rough. Sharing your successes helps motivate you to continue toward healthy goals and positive habits.
4. Develop Self-Compassion
When you find yourself overwhelmed by emotions because of challenging situations, remind yourself that you are not alone, and suffering is a part of the human experience, not a reflection of some personal deficiency. Self-compassion can be reaching out to someone, reminding yourself to live in the present moment rather than focusing too much on your past or your future, or practicing mindful gratitude simply by thinking of things in your life that you appreciate.
The Small Wins Lead to Big Victories in Recovery
It’s been nearly three years since I tried my first crow pose in yoga. I still can’t stay in that pose for more than five seconds. But those five seconds are more than I could do the first time. I carry this with me as a lesson of persistence, patience, and self-compassion, and I hope the same for clients. Recovery, just like life, is not a linear path. The more you take notice your own accomplishments and small victories, the more you can build trust in yourself to continue working toward your goals and living a meaningful life.
About the Author
Alyssa Hufana, MA
Alyssa Hufana, MA is a Co-Occurring Disorders (COD) intern at Sanctuary Centers and a 3rd year doctoral candidate in counseling psychology at the University of California, Santa Barbara. Previously, Alyssa has worked with individuals and families in outpatient settings and college students regarding mental health and substance use. She specializes in resilience, wellness, prevention, and intervention for minority populations and is an American Psychological Association Minority Fellow sponsored by the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA).
Alyssa,
Thank you Alyssa. It is a gloomy day today here in Iowa. We have been teased with warm sunny weather lately, then comes that cold windy air from Canada for a day or two as we move toward Spring, and I again realize that I am not in charge of the pace. I have to reel back in my expectations and, in writing, confirm that I will not miss those small beautiful steps into Spring. You helped me do that today. Thanks.
Alyssa – Such a wonderful message! Thank you.
Hi Alyssa! Congrats for that nice article. It was well written. Keep on writing my dear.