Some things are hard to put into words. Addiction is one of them. Finding an accurate way to describe and define addiction has even vexed professionals through the years. People can describe almost anything as “addictive” or “addicting” – cake, apps, exercise – but that doesn’t mean we really know or understand what it means to be an addict. We have our ideas, but it’s difficult to come up with an agreed upon definition for what constitutes addiction.
The Stigma of Addiction
In the past, addiction was not something to talk about. We might have learned from society or even from family members that addiction was something to be shunned. When people with addiction reported that they felt lost, helpless, and undeserving of support, somehow that message got miscommunicated as an idea that addiction is an issue of personal weakness, poor decisions, and wrong actions. Because of this early miscommunication, the stigma of addiction is still very real, to this day.
This stigma has caused some who struggle with addiction to find themselves cast aside by their friends and family members. Because our definitions of “addiction” began with blaming the person for their struggles and their substance use, our society has criminalized substance use and marginalized substance users. This narrow, inaccurate definition of the problem also painted a bleak and seemingly impossible future for those with addiction.
Those stigmas and misunderstandings of the past must be replaced by real facts about addiction (based on trends and statistics from the National Institute of Drug Abuse):
- In America, 20.3 million adults have substance use disorders.
- Individuals are starting to use more substances earlier in life; in 2018, over half of twelfth graders had used a minimum of one substance in their lifetime. This is troubling because earlier use has been proven to significantly increase the risks associated with development of addiction or mental illness.
- Abuse of tobacco, alcohol and illicit drugs is expensive for our nation, amounting to more than $740 billion annually in costs relating to crime, lost work productivity and health care.
- In just the past two decades, the national drug overdose death rate has quadrupled.
Even just a cursory glance at the numbers tells us that our society’s problems with addictions are getting worse, not better. Problems associated with addictions are getting bigger and more expensive by the year. From this data, I believe we can agree that our definitions and approaches to addiction aren’t working. Addiction expert, Dr. Gabor Mate, has articulated in that past that our current use of punishment and shame to address addiction only serves to continue the vicious cycle of recidivism – the tendency of a convicted criminal to reoffend. Instead, we should be looking to design a system in which our most rejected and ignored are given the tools to help them recover and thrive. Addiction is not a story about the weak-willed or damaged, but of those who need our attention and care the most.
What if we evolved our definitions a little bit? What if we looked beyond the person and into the nature of substance use as a whole? What could we find? Could we find a better way to treat people? Could we find a better way to treat addiction?
Founded in 1935, the 12-step movement paved the way for the “disease” model of addiction. The philosophy and literature of this movement still form the foundation for AA, NA and other-anonymous groups out there. In its time, it the movement was instrumental in changing our approach to addiction and setting the tone for new conversations, new research, and new hope for recovery. These new conversations and new research led us to learn that drugs are only part of the equation; we also needed to consider environmental and genetic factors at play. We had to start thinking about addiction in terms of bad coping skills born of a bad situation. When someone is in a bad situation, they often learn bad coping skills. The bad coping skills only serve to compound problems and exacerbate the bad situation. Addiction is about getting stuck in that vicious cycle.
New research further shows that addiction is the result of the brain being hijacked by this cycle, to the point that we are unable to control our thoughts, emotions, and actions. Without treatment, addiction gets worse. Attempts at recovery and subsequent relapses are all part of this cycle, but these new conversations are showing us there is hope for people with addiction.
Treating Addiction with Community
People struggling with addiction are caught in this cycle of bad coping for a bad situation. In the midst of this struggle, they are first and foremost in need of a sense of belonging. A sense of belonging to a community where they are not made into outcasts due to their limited systems of coping. We all want some form of belonging. It is a very human need. None of us can truly thrive without community. The addiction counselors at Sanctuary Centers know this; it’s why our model includes group therapy where people come together, listen to each other, and build each other up. If only we could bring that same sense of fellowship and understanding to the world at large. The trauma of addiction should not be placed solely on the backs of a drug user, but in the hands of each and every one of us. It’s time to stop seeing addicts as criminals, delinquents, or burn-outs, Instead, we must see them as they are: people who just need a little help.
This new definition for addiction addresses the ways each person uses an external source of coping to address their internal strife. This is far more relatable to the general public and offers a view of addiction that is easier to understand for those who still hold outdated and unproductive beliefs on the subject. This would allow for others to find their compassion and empathy, since everyone can relate to the need for this type of bonding. People with addiction follows similar patterns and processes as people who eat ice cream when they are sad, go shopping when they’re angry, or binge watch TV to escape the realities of a tumultuous relationship. We all can fall into the trap of seeking the easiest and most pleasurable way to deal with our emotions, even when we know it won’t actually solve the problem long term.
Connecting to a community is the fastest way to combat the stigma that insidiously confines addiction into a black hole of secrecy, shame, and judgment. We all know it isn’t easy to be involved with someone who has substance use difficulties. Struggle with substance use tend to bring out the worst sides of us – both in those with addiction and in those who love them most. Where substance use tears us apart, recovery can bring us together. All of us impacted by substance use need to come together in an environment that is both welcoming of our past struggles, and encouraging for our future healing.
At Sanctuary Centers, we are often told by those impacted by substance use “I feel so lost, and I don’t know what to do.” These heartbreaking words come from those with addictions, as well as the friends and family members who love them. We don’t claim to have the perfect phrase to tell them, nor are we saying we have the magical solution. What we are suggesting is this: a community in which those who feel lost can allow themselves to feel other things – compassion, empathy, love, healing – as we sit together and say to one another, “Sometimes I feel lost and don’t know what to do either. But right now, we are here together. What can we do to help? What do you need for us to do together?”
For an excellent summary of how connection (not sobriety) is the core of recovery, please watch the video embedded in this post.
About the Author
Christina Grabowsky, LMFT
Christina Grabowsky, LMFT is Assistant Clinical Director at Sanctuary Centers. Since she began with Sanctuary in early 2015, Christina has been working with clients who have mental health and substance use struggles. Christina communicates with our community partners on behalf of our clients who struggle with homelessness and legal issues as a result of their mental health and substance use symptoms, advocating for access to treatment for these individuals instead of incarceration.
Cyndie Westerhoff, AMFT
Cyndie Westerhoff, AMFT is Program Director for Co-Occurring Disorders at Sanctuary Centers. Cyndie has been working at Sanctuary Centers since 2012, and began working specifically with clients in the Co-Occurring disorders program in 2015. She is currently working towards licensure as an Associate Marriage and Family Therapist.
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Much wisdom. I don’t know why but I’m still a little bit gun shy because I’m judged by people at an instant. It may be because I have had long blonde hair all my life and society rules me out cause I don’t lessen my self as they like to do. So I’m alone almost every where I go. I’d love to talk further. I need self esteem and to feel more confident about myself. Therapy would sure help me.